The Healing Power of Gratitude
The holiday season provides an annual reminder to pause and be grateful for all we have. That reminder is needed and helpful because it’s human nature to focus instead on all of the things we don’t have.
The culture we live in bombards us with messages that we should have more, do more, and be more. Driven strongly by social media and advertisements, we’re conditioned to believe that what we have isn’t enough. That’s a recipe for discontent, depression, and despair.
That’s also why it’s so important to incorporate gratitude into our lives during the holidays—and every day throughout the year.
As a mental health professional for 35 years, I’ve counseled hundreds of people struggling with anxiety, depression, addictions, relationship problems, and other serious challenges. Almost always, the practice of gratitude is emphasized in treatment as a step toward wellness and health.
I’ve come to believe that gratitude is the antidote for every toxic thing that comes into our lives. Simply put, gratitude fosters optimism, which strengthens hope. Whether your life includes serious difficulties or is relatively stable, the practice of giving thanks is sure to fortify and enrich your life. Here are some reasons why.
The Science of Gratitude
Gratitude promotes wellness in numerous ways. Over the past few decades, social scientists have accumulated a body of research demonstrating how gratitude enhances well-being: improved self-esteem, better sleep, boosted immunity, decreased depression, reduced anxiety, stronger relationships, and more.
Two leading gratitude researchers, Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, have extensively studied the benefits of being thankful for daily blessings.
“When people are grateful, they experience ‘calm energy’—they feel more alert, alive, interested, enthusiastic,” Emmons said.
Research by Emmons and McCullough includes asking study participants to keep a gratitude journal in which they record at least three things per day that they’re thankful for. Results found that people who stick with this activity score 25 percent higher on surveys that measure happiness, sleep a half-hour longer most nights, and exercise 33 percent more every week than those who don’t make gratitude a daily practice.
What’s more, researchers at Harvard University conducted an analysis of numerous studies and concluded: “In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.”
Gratitude is something we can control in our lives. Gratitude isn’t simply a response we feel when things go right. It’s a deliberate attitude we choose even when they don’t. It’s the decision to consciously acknowledge the many things in our lives that are good, enjoyable, and beneficial. Because, no matter how trying your circumstances, there’s always something to notice and appreciate.
Many things in life we have little or no control over: inflation, being downsized from a job, an out-of-the-blue diagnosis, and political and social strife. So much is beyond our individual control—but not so with gratitude. It’s a matter of making a choice, consistently and genuinely.
Gratitude “recruits” other positive emotions. When we choose gratitude, we often find that hope, courage, and other helpful emotions join in to strengthen us. When we take the time to be thankful, joy and contentment spring up as well. Negative emotions—such as anger, jealousy, greed, and fear—all lose power when pitted against gratitude.
Likeminded emotions tend to cluster together. Choose gratitude and you’ll soon notice that it lifts the tide of many other emotions.
Gratitude shifts our focus from negative to positive. We all have far more to be thankful for than we realize. Problems always make the most noise in our lives, so we give them our attention. Purposefully cultivating gratitude quickly reveals that trouble isn’t all we have.
When we’re hurting, our thoughts and emotions are drawn to the source of pain like iron chips to a magnet. We dwell on our own weaknesses, poor decisions, and disappointments. However, choosing to be thankful draws our thoughts and emotions away from our distress and places them on our blessings.
Gratitude reveals the bright side in dark times. True gratitude goes much deeper than the clichés that say, “Every dark cloud has a silver lining” or “Look at the glass as half full, not half empty.” Even the bleakest of circumstances and toughest situations hold legitimate reasons to be thankful. Appreciating even the smallest of blessings helps you withstand the pain of loneliness, broken relationships, and dashed dreams.
We can choose to say, “I will resent” or “I will rejoice.” Our decision makes all the difference between experiencing the freedom to move forward or being bound up by bitterness. When we seize the opportunity to express gratitude, we take hold of a weapon that will help us prevail over resentment and disappointment.
Gratitude expands exponentially. I’ve noticed countless times that depressed people tend to look for things to be depressed about. Everywhere, they see more and more reasons to be depressed. The same principle applies to those struggling with anxiety and other emotional challenges.
Thankfully, the opposite is also true. The more we intentionally practice gratitude, the more we’ll find to be grateful for. The choices we make and the things we seek out build momentum for the positive or the negative. Seek and you shall find.
This concept has a connection to our physiology. Researcher Alex Kolb examined several scientific studies on the link between gratitude and mental health and concluded the following: “Feelings of gratitude directly activated brain regions associated with the neurotransmitter dopamine [a ‘feel-good’ chemical]. … Gratitude can have such a powerful impact on your life because it engages your brain in a virtuous cycle. … And the dopamine reinforces that as well. So once you start seeing things to be grateful for, your brain starts looking for more things to be grateful for. That’s how the virtuous cycle gets created.”
Grow Your Gratitude
Sometimes, your personal troubles make it hard to muster gratitude. Plus, it’s not always easy to practice daily gratitude amid a culture of stress, busyness, and discontent. If you want to boost the level of thankfulness in your life, start with these ideas:
Notice small moments that bring you joy. Try saying thanks for your favorite movie, crisp leaves on a fall day, the taste of your favorite tea, the phone call from your best friend, the sound of a giggling child, or the chance to sleep in on a Saturday morning.
Keep a gratitude journal. Spend a few minutes each day listing three blessings in your life and describe how you’re enriched by them. Naming the things you’re thankful for each day will cause you to see more and more.
Take a fresh look at friends and family. The people closest to us are sometimes taken for granted. Count your blessings for those who love and support you.
Celebrate creativity. Every day, our lives are enhanced by artistic expression—music, literature, cinema, and theater. Be grateful you live in such a rich and textured creative culture.
Make daily rituals special. Sit and enjoy your morning coffee rather than quaffing it down as you hurry out the door. If walking your dog is typically boring for you, change your mindset and notice how much fun your pooch is having.
Look at the world through a child’s eyes. Children don’t fret about the future, nor do they dwell in the past. They appreciate the present moment, with all of its opportunities and pleasures.
Give a compliment to someone. By thinking about who and what you’ll praise, you’ll appreciate that individual and the quality you admire.
Pray or meditate. These practices shut out the noisy world and focus your thoughts on a power much bigger than yourself. Make thankfulness a big part of your prayer or meditation time.
Mine today for possibility. Every day is an opportunity to steer your life in a new direction and find blessings. Believe it’s true. Get out of bed tomorrow morning and go look for it.